John 20:27
Stop.
Take a few deep breaths. What questions are plaguing your mind today? Bring them before God without trying to answer or rationalize them.
Listen.
Then [Jesus] said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” – John 20:27
Reflect.
In John’s gospel, the word usually translated as “believe” could more accurately be translated as “trust”. In fact, where Jesus says “Do not doubt but believe”, we could pretty fairly translate, “Don’t not-trust, but trust.” Jesus doesn’t accuse Thomas of doubt in the way we think of doubt. He doesn’t say Thomas has demonstrated a failure of will or faithfulness. There’s just trust and not-trust. Jesus encourages Thomas to trust.
Thomas has shown that he’s both bold (see John 11:16) and honest (see John 14:5) before. His desire to experience Jesus in the flesh isn’t asking for something that the other disciples didn’t also get. Jesus does not condemn him for a lack of faith or refuse to give Thomas what he wanted. Jesus knows and loves Thomas no matter what. This isn’t about Jesus – this is about Thomas.
Too often, we act like doubt is the opposite of faith. When questions arise, when things don’t check out, or when we say we need more, we over-react by chastising the asker. “Just have faith!” we insist, like faith means you can’t ask questions or ask anything of God. In his interaction with Thomas, it might sound like Jesus is making doubt and belief into opposites. He isn’t. He’s actually saying that there’s just trust and not-trust. You can have trust and still ask questions or experience doubt. Trust simply continues to guide us through these times of questioning. Again, trust isn’t for Jesus – trust is for us.
Instead of being hard on yourself when you feel doubt, rely on trust in God. God will give you what you need and stay with you no matter what. Therefore, you have space to investigate your questions. Trust is God’s gift for you. Trust guides you through the hard times, just like it did for Thomas.
Pray.
God, I trust in you. I praise you for that gift of trust. Thank you for being with me when I wonder, question, doubt, or fear. Help me to release these things so that my relationship with you can truly flourish. Amen.
Carry On.
What’s one doubt you’ve always had about your faith but have hard time talking about? Spend some time researching that question or talking with someone about it. You don’t have to resolve the doubt; you can simply feel free to wonder about it.